President Trump Kicks Off Reelection Campaign, Senate Kicks Off Millions From Healthcare – SOME NEWS

President Trump Kicks Off Reelection Campaign, Senate Kicks Off Millions From Healthcare – SOME NEWS

This Week: Donald Trump is already campaigning for re-election because apparently being President of the United States of America leaves him with too much of free time. Mitch McConnell and the Senate unveiled their secret healthcare plans which will kick millions off health care. Also, Uber’s former CEO is hanging out in an UberPool of his own tears, Philando Castile apparently WASN’T murdered, and Josh and Drake and Drake and Josh!

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20 Responses

  1. ZubularMobile says:

    OMG, saw the thumbnail, raced to the kitchen grab popcorn!!!

  2. SkuzzyJ says:

    Welcome to America. It’s a clusterfuck.

  3. Suzanne Berry says:

    Love “a murder” of Senators.

  4. Rick McCallister says:

    The last time I came this early, I got my money back.

  5. Star Hunter says:

    Republicans lied about death panels but this bill WILL fucking kill people.

  6. Venu GOPAL JOSHI says:

    Some News: Helping you cope with reality

  7. Jacquelyn Deport says:

    Love this series just as much as I love After Hours.

  8. charles townsend says:

    Yeah guns protect people. Maybe people in America should buy guns to prevent them from being shot by cops, as not having a gun doesn’t seem to work.

  9. Justin Barnes says:

    I wonder how extreme the police have to get before people deal with the problem.

  10. Evan Sageser says:

    Actually a group of Senators is typically known as an Incompetence.

  11. Tomanista says:

    It’s been so long since the last one I thought the US had ceased to exist.

  12. MrJohnycomelately21 says:

    I’m not sure America can be called a Country anymore.

  13. 8523wsxc says:

    Dear USA, you are shooting each other way too much. It’s getting kinda embarrassing and old. How about a break, or just maybe stop for a little while?

  14. Quintin Blanson says:

    Human beings didn’t survive because of “survival of the fittest” we’ve survive because we were co-operative.

  15. Razar Campbell says:

    I hope this becomes popular enough for president plump to gainsay it as ‘fake news’.

  16. SPDYellow says:

    I object to comparing Trump to Julius Caesar. Julius Caesar had competence as both a military and political leader. Julius Caesar helped conquer many lands in service to Rome and achieved fame by crossing the Rubicon, something which was seen as an impossible feat and still deserves to be seen as one of those great feats in military history. Donald Trump, on the other hand, is a con man with numerous failed business ventures, one of which was a casino. I repeat, a casino. Donald Trump managed to go broke running a business that is basically “Give me money with very little expectation that you will get any return on your money.” And yet we chose to give this idiot access to nuclear launch codes.

  17. box00 says:

    These are way too short. It seriously sucks living in the alternate, dystopian timeline…

  18. DuskMindAbyss says:

    Your cops are shooting pregnant women? What the fuck, USA? Get your shit together!

  19. NotSoWittyNow says:

    nobody calls your president the leader of the free world anymore.

  20. Shawn Wesley says:

    Both of my Senators are Democrats who are very clearly opposed to this taxcut-murder-bill. Also, they’ve been trying to actually dig into the Senate’s investigation of the Russian Interference/Collusion thing but getting blocked by complicit Republicans in Trump’s pocket. So… that’s frustrating as all hell.

    But for some reason people in other states keep on giving Republicans a pass on all the harmful or useless shit they do — and all the _blatant_ lies they spin. What is wrong with all of you?!
    …or did you even vote them in? Because after some things I’ve heard I can’t rule out that Republicans have gotten their hands on hacking software security analysts have developed that can covertly alter vote tallies in those machines. And they might not even have to go that far. There’s also the laws Reps pass in their districts/states to prevent as many non-republicans from voting as possible.

    I just don’t know how we’re supposed to pretend that we have a fair and functional government when one side is constantly cheating and quite possibly infringing on the constitution in order to maintain their grasp on power. Meanwhile, the other side is far too forgiving and lenient on the cheaters/potential-criminals every time they have a chance to mete out some sort of just consequences.

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