The Skyrim Speedrun to murder all the Jarls

The Skyrim Speedrun to murder all the Jarls

Speedrun to make a new file, kill every leader as fast as possible.

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Doug is a sentient bell pepper who was hired by the FBI to crack gaming challenges and also talk about things with food

#Skyrim #Speedrun #Jarl

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45 Responses

  1. DougDoug says:

    Oops, apparently the plushie is $30. But it’s 10% off the next the next 3 days for Black Friday!

    • JackGeass says:


    • lucaZERO blue version says:

      0:05 dougdoug is a TF2 fan confirmed

    • Tylor Smith says:

      You forgot the Emperor….

    • I am a PERSON says:

      @Natnat 24 thanks

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      Megan: ”Hotter”
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  2. Ghostguyhi Is dumb says:

    “We robbed an old lady using tomatoes” is probably the best thing I’ve heard in a while.

  3. Salutations YT! says:

    It’s been years since the “Games with food” series was big on this channel, yet we’ve just now gotten the Carrots as the main antagonist to the peppers in the Lore

  4. 12 PackersFan says:

    Most assassination plots: *involve complex plans with dozens of factors*

    Doug: *just walks in and deep fries everyone*

  5. GINGEYYY says:

    “Welcome to Doug Doug where we solve common everyday problems”
    I sense…a disturbance.

  6. Carl de la Paz says:

    so nice to see Doug discovering the joys of speed running. at first you have a strat and you try to improve and then with a random thing in the game you improve by over 10 min

  7. Skyborn Wanderer says:

    The arrest dialogue failing / canceling itself might be related to the game taking a few seconds to add the murder to the bounty, as after waiting for the 1000 coins added message it didn’t do it again.

  8. Pearse Traynor says:

    This seems like a legit speedrun category if you could get enough people to commit to it. Throughout that whole process I was thinking of ways to cut down time (paying bounty instead of jail time to save on load screens, timing the Markarth kill so you don’t have to wait 6 hours for them to turn up which costs 15-20 seconds).

    I’d 100% be down with this

  9. Ch1l1C0nCarnag3 says:

    I love how the guards will just let a completely random nobody walk up to the most powerful people in Skyrim, either because they don’t tell them their reason or say they’ve got some questions.
    Skyrim guards are about as effective as trying to play chess with checkers pieces.

  10. Vester Blue says:

    You lead a city of panicking citizens, news of a dragon attack in Helgen sending enough fear through the city that eventually the citizens would do the work of a dozen dragons. You yearn to leave your castle to calm your citizens, but a message from Whiterun has kept you careful. Apparently some prisoner from Helgen had some time ago slain the jarl. Two more messengers confirm that he slayed jarls from a few less populated cities. The door to the hall slammed open, as if hit by a battering ram. The whole court looked to see a man covered in water and snow, all excluding his hands at least. In his hands two dancing balls of fire sent gusts of steam around their radius.

    “Faster, gotta go faster.”

    The man sprinted at an almost unrivaled pace towards you, two streams of flame already lancing through your armor and skin. All the while, the murderer spike to unknown figures. What demons drove him? What beasts of darkness could hope to contain him?

    When the man finished the deed, he sprinted from the chamber, never to be seen again.

    Your death and the deaths of all the Jarls left the world in turmoil, just in time for the arrival of Aldiun. In the end, Skyrim fell to madness and monsters, eldritch beings fighting dragons and vampires. Nothing remained in the end.

    All this for a speedrun. The world destroyed in half an hour.

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