This AWFUL Pinocchio Movie is PURE CHAOS

This AWFUL Pinocchio Movie is PURE CHAOS

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44 Responses

  1. N. O says:

    The cat is the best character. He’s the only one with consistency. He shows a consistent need to destroy things.

    Just like a real cat.

  2. Potato Master says:

    The saddest thing is that the Netflix Pinocchio (which has about a billion times more effort put into it), with its brilliant stop motion animation and it’s great voice acting, being overshadowed by THIS.

    • Lord Drayvon says:

      @Chickengirl005 judging by the release date, they’re not. The Del Toro Pinocchio film comes out in December and the Disney film in 2022. Unless they push it back, there won’t be a problem. Then again, I bet the demake will be so shit that it’ll heavily overshadow the Del Toro film anyway.

    • Chickengirl005 says:

      ppl will forget about this movie in a couple weeks. Now, the real shitty thing will be if Disney deliberately releases their live action remake of Pinocchio at the same time that Del Toro’s Pinocchio on Netflix comes out, as a way to shut the film out from people’s attention

    • Alice Rivierre says:

      @yokai watcher true. Wait for the other 3, and then rank. ❤

    • Olle Selin says:

      3…..

  3. Cyrus The Great says:

    This movie is an instant classic. It’s right up there with The Room and Troll 2.

  4. BlazeDultimate says:

    It shouldn’t be called a “true story” unless Pinocchio actually hangs himself like in the original book

  5. I'm a motherfreaking avocado says:

    And somehow Pinocchio being straight is still the biggest plot twist of this movie

    • Starsia Draws says:

      @xvoidmushroom I don’t think the problem is his voice sounding stereotypically gay, but the fact that it feels like the actors are just regular ass people trying to read lines for their high school play-

    • Nick Kohlmann says:

      @xvoidmushroom It does? Did we just watch the same video?

    • xvoidmushroom says:

      i love (/s) how the entire base of half of the internet hating this show is because they associated his feminine voice acting with just being gay an like. that’s the only joke made

  6. Pumkin Spice says:

    Imagine making a Pinocchio film where his nose doesn’t grow when he lies. That’s like his defining trait other than being a puppet. It’s so ingrained in popular culture that there’s even an emoji for it 🤥.

  7. HunterCool22 says:

    My theory is that Pauly Shore wasn’t instructed to voice his lines like this. He probably knew that the production company would be unlikely to find another English-speaking celebrity willing to be in the film so he started messing around to see what he could get away with, and they were either too scared to call his bluff or just didn’t give a crap.

  8. Azrael Entertainment says:

    As a Russian, I can admit: we are incredibly ashamed of the subpar projects that our cinema fund sponsors, while actually inspired film students have little to no chance of bringing vision of some quality cinema to the world:/

  9. Sasha Gelman says:

    Hey, so uh, you probably didn’t know, but this story isn’t actually based on Pinocchio. It’s based on the Russian version “Buratino” that was made when outside content wasn’t allowed in Russia, the Soviet Union, or something. The story starts making more sense when you know that, because in Buratino there WAS a blue-haired girl, a talking cat with guns, and a talking fox. The main focus of Buratino was also the gold coins, so that makes sense… Oh, and the author of Buratino had to change the stretchy nose thing, so that’s sort of redeeming. The story is more understandable when you know Buratino, maybe you should check it out. Also, I am not defending this movie, it’s just that nobody knows about this, and I think it’s important to know before criticizing the movie’s plot, thank yew.

    • Moon says:

      @Diego Well, I think that because of this Buratino in Soviet version called like this, because of this translation. For soviet children it’s just a name, but still have some meaning

    • Diego says:

      I want to say one thing- the blue haired girl (aka how the Blue Fairy was *actually* supposed to look like, not some random blond chick in a blue dress smh), talking fox and talking cat were present in the original italian book as well. The title “buratino” is also really funny as a native italian speaker since burattino means puppet in italian.

    • Moon says:

      @Icheeva Kaigan no. It’s also not so accurate to Buratino, and they’re was no talking horse. It’s truly amalgam of Buratino (most part) and Pinocchio, and something that scriptwriters made up

    • Icheeva Kaigan says:

      Ah but is it accurate to Buratino? Is there a talking horse in that? I’m curious

  10. Gab says:

    Aw damn it. I was actually hoping this would be so-bad-it’s-good.

    But, the trailer with it’s femboy pinocchio voice will always have a place in my heart, because the delivery of his infamous line was so horrid but so amazing.

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