Meanwhile… The Super Hot Lincoln Statue

Meanwhile… The Super Hot Lincoln Statue

It’s the statue of a young, shirtless Lincoln that some are calling ‘Babe Lincoln.’

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69 Responses

  1. New Message says:

    The News baboons at FOX are gonna be eating more of it than they’ll be throwing soon enough.

  2. Dirty Dialga says:

    Stephen should play an evil genius in a real-life Scooby Doo Movie.

  3. New Message says:

    He should have been wearing the Big Furry Hat when he demanded the elixir.

  4. Diana Mitford says:

    God, we could use Abe Lincoln right now 🙁

    • Mathias B. says:

      i would settle on that taco bell source as a replacement for trump …

    • Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey says:

      +John Marston Better, in one sense – he wouldn’t be tweeting his random thoughts every other goddamn minute.

    • Nerag says:

      HAWT LINCOLN/CALIGULA’S HORSE FOR GOP NOMINEE 2020!

    • Tetsujin says:

      Being “pre smartphone” (and pre-automobile, etc.) would limit Lincoln’s useful knowledge, but not his intelligence, conviction, or character. People can adapt, you know? The real question is whether he would truly live up to the legend built around him.

    • Valerie Favazza says:

      We could use anyone but Trump in these dark days…

  5. New Message says:

    Karma was just making up for all the good deeds that didn’t go unpunished.

  6. Andrew Johnson says:

    If SC was our immortal ruler at least we would get the Green New Deal.

    • Pwnopolis says:

      The “New Green Deal” isn’t all its cracked up to be.
      You can’t just tackle every issue with a one shot approach.
      Reality isnt that simple unfortunately.

  7. TheIriscot says:

    The elixir of youth found in a tomb priceless

  8. Krystof Dayne says:

    I think the best part about Meanwhile are the variations on the introduction 😂

  9. Shmuggz says:

    Meanwhile…. Taco Bell serves as sustenance.
    EDIT: Taco Bell sauce = Chinese Elixir.

    I have restored faith that humanity will survive after Trump starts WW3. 👍

    • chez moi says:

      As long as we remember to fill our pockets at the condiment bar.

    • Todd Crabtree says:

      That’s the fast food war Demolition Man was talking about where Taco Bell won out. Trump started it when he was finally denied his bedtime cheeseburgers.

    • Alexander Canella says:

      To be fair, Trump is less likely to start ww3 than Clinton. I mean, he actually likes Russia and has a lot of business there and in China. NK is becoming slightly less of a threat as well. Silver linings, I guess

    • chez moi says:

      +Alexander Canella You have got to be kidding. My heart was in my mouth back when he was calling KJU ‘little rocket man’. The only thing that may have saved us at that point is that Trump out-crazied him. *_Meanwhile,_* he alienates our allies on every side, weakening our ties with NATO and leaving Europe and the Eastern bloc more vulnerable to Putin’s ratfucking. If he has avoided setting one off, it is only through sheer incompetence and dumb luck.
      Oh, and I’ll just share this new post from Randy Rainbow, which just sort of sums it up:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7q0bz0sk30

  10. Krista C says:

    How amazing would it have been if when he was demanding the elixir, the camera cut back to him and he was suddenly wearing his big furry hat? 😂

  11. Space-Cadet David 'Spanky Bonespurs' Dennison : says:

    Ally the Dog is lucky to survive (not being eaten).
    The Elixir of Immortality should go to Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
    Abraham Lincoln was a hit with the ladies performing as “Magic Abe XXL”, showing why he really needs a stovepipe hat!

  12. itsanit123 says:

    Actually elixirs were often poisons, which where meant to take you to an afterlife with a celestial beurocracy. Not a joke

    • WormholeJim says:

      Then lobbyists in time succeeded in relabeling these toxins as ‘food additives.’ Alchemists *meanwhile* went through an image transformation from cryptic wizard-types to mexican food vendors and then rebranded the elixir formulas as “Taco sauce recipes.” You still don’t turn golden, though.

    • kourii says:

      *bureaucracy

    • Pwnopolis says:

      No one cares @kourii

  13. Knives says:

    If only dogs could talk. The things they would say about us.

    • Mark T says:

      Then they would tell everyone what you do with the peanut butter

    • cybercat29 says:

      +Raggaliamous Your dear sweet kitty has you all well trained 🙂

    • retnavybrat says:

      +Mathias B. He doesn’t jump, but he will stand up on his hind legs and brace his paws on the edge of the table to look at what’s there.

    • retnavybrat says:

      +Raggaliamous My dad and stepmom’s cat will do that, plus cry as if he hasn’t been fed in decades. We usually relent to his wishes as well, either by giving him a little bit of meat (chicken is his favorite) or a few of his treats.

    • Mathias B. says:

      +retnavybrat the cat of a coworker of me just sits on foods that he wants so you need to eat where he cant reach … he mostly eats standing up

  14. Trine Langohr says:

    They’ve had a statue of a young beardless, shirtless Lincoln SINCE 1941 and they gave him a renaissance body?! What was going on in 1941 that history classes didn’t tell me about??

    • . says:

      1941 must have been a strange, drug-fuelled era, man. XD

    • Venky Wank says:

      Perhaps somebody thought a particular Fuhrer was homo-sexual and looking at that statue would “soothe” him, and someone went to all that trouble creating a shirtless Ab-lincoln to test it out, but obviously some selfish ass-hat wanted it all to himself. So he let the world go to shit just to serve his selfish needs.

      Or not

    • LupineShadowOmega says:

      Answer: A lot. History tends to get sanitized in the telling. So just imagine all of the weird and unspeakable things that we don’t know about the past.

    • Duston Call says:

      Y…M…C…A

  15. Harumia Amirah says:

    A karma paid in cash.

  16. Kaguya says:

    Aw, man! The first name that came to my mind was, “Lincoln Log.”

  17. Ella Rose says:

    Lol. I thought the elixir was going to be fermented urine

  18. Radosław Kowalczyk says:

    Wouldn’t it be crazy if the elixir of immortality turn out to be the taco bell fire sauce? That would neatly explain why he survived

  19. NKDuisburg02 says:

    The nicknames for the statue are hilarious

  20. Eisdax says:

    Better idea: give the elixir to Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

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